» If you can read this, you're not doing whatever you're supposed to be doing right now either.
» GSM: Geen Snoer Meer
» I back up my files religiously. I pray nothing happens to them.
» Een boom-o-fiel is iemand die takken afrukt.
» Boer: I fuk horses. Amerikaan: Pardon? Boer: Paarden ja.
» Callcenter: Bent u de beslissingnemer in uw huishouden? Klant: Dat weet ik niet, even aan mijn vrouw vragen.
» Gouden idee (steel het niet!) : Double-sided PDFs
» You can drink until someone becomes pretty, but you can't drink enough to make them smart.
» Bekend nederlands spreekwoord: His rooster must always crow King
» Drugs, is not the answer unless the question is why are you eating spaghetti with your hands
» The past, the present & the future walk into a bar. It was tense.
» Als ik boodschappen ga halen dan gaan de deuren van AH vanzelf open als ik er aan kom. The Force is with me.
» Cats are just nature's middle finger
» In a past life, I was stoned to death for believing in reincarnation
» My time machine and I go way back
» My therapist said I have multiple personalities and rage issues. So we hit him.
» Het weer: Vanaf 12 uur worden er middagtemperaturen verwacht tot 18 uur
» If I'm asked on my deathbed what was my greatest regret in life I would have to say dying
» Het meervoud van water is wateren
» Voorkom parkeerboetes door je ruitenwissers in de snelstand te laten staan
» Weerspreuk: Als het regent in mei, dan is april voorbij!
» If you go to the gym, but don't post about it on any social media sites, did it really happen?
» Pollen is nature's way of raping you in the face
» A multivitamin a day keeps the vegetables away
» Now that zombies are all the rage, vampires are dead to me
» Love means never having to say anything because you're both looking at your smart phones
» Cows are pretty nice to us considering that we eat them
» Prune juice is the way to go
» Honk if you love Jesus. Text while driving if you want to meet him.
» They called it Twitter because Everybody poops was taken
» I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now
» Sadly enough, people with epilepsy have the moves like Jagger
» KTC: The program formerly known as KMB
» Books: Because your mind is an infinitely darler more terrifying place then any film director's interpretation
» 1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depesssion 5. Acceptance. The five stages of realizing you're out of coffee.
» When I'm on my deathbed, I won't regret anything in my life except buying a deathbed.
» Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is, we'll find it.
» Ik luisterde niet goed, dus laat ik maar leuk lachen en hopen dat het geen vraag was.
» Gisteren was vandaag morgen; morgen zal gisteren vandaag zijn.
» Yoda of Borg are we. Assimilated prepare to be.
» Some people get married because they're tired of dieting
» Voor elke oplossing is wel een probleem te vinden
» Hoge glazen vangen veel bier
» You can't cure obesity with bigger pants
» Do not panic! Just google it.
» A mistake is simply another way of doing things
» Karl Marx was wrong. Religion is not the opiate of the masses. Twitter is. Also Angry Birds.
» Zie er slanker uit door het vermijden van horizontaal getreepte kleding en voedsel
» Ik weet niet wat SOPA is, even zoeken op Wikipedia...
» Everybody is ignorent, only on different subjects.
» Rejection is just another word for a new opportunity
» If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution.
» Talk to the hand, but don't sign anything.
» After I already clicked "No" to making IE9 my default browser, the second prompt that said, "Please?" was a bit much.
» Sorry about all the typos lately, gays
» ADHD is about not being able to pay attention. Twitter is about never getting enough attention.
» Lost time is never found again
» There are 2 types of people in the world: people that complete their statements &
» Curiosity killed the cat because the cat woke Curiosity up at 6am
» Wrestling was invented because guys felt like hugging just wasn't enough
» A clean house is the sign of a broken computer
» Don't worry what people think, they don't do it very often
» Sometimes the Force is with you, and sometimes you're just some jerk in a bathrobe waving a plastic lightsaber.
» To err is human ... to really foul up requires the root password
» Life is too short to remove USB safely
» Facebook & You: If you're not paying for it, you're not the customer. You're the product being sold.
» When life gives you questions, Google has answers
» Crazy that, before electricity, they had to power guitars with steam
» To exceed beyond your wildest expectations you must begin with wild expectations
» When you are arguing with a fool, make sure he isn't doing the same thing.
» Vanilla Ice got a bad rap but he recorded it anyway